Michal Matyjasik
October 25, 2017 13:29
Most of my friends climb here, which has kept me coming back for the 3 darkest, coldest months out of the year. However, next winter I will be climbing at the BRC. Between the overgreased, archaic holds that look like they haven't been cleaned since the gym was opened, the ever-diminishing quality of route-setting, and the pungent stench of corporate vibe, Movement Boulder has really turned me off. There are occasionally some pretty decent routes to climb, but the majority of routes are awkward with a lack of flow. Furthermore, routes seem to get left up for 1.5-2 months, at which point the holds have the slick, greasy look and feel of Rifle limestone. The boulder problems are occasionally decent, but mostly tweaky, awkward, and very overcrowded. For how much these extortionists charge for membership, you would think that they could afford to reset routes and problems more than once a month and maybe clean the damn holds every once in a while.
The staff ranges from friendly and helpful to blase and disinterested, and I can't say I blame the latter. These poor kids earn $10-$12 an hour in a city where working at this rate even full-time is not a living wage. While the staff claim that Movement is not "corporate", the corporate vibe is overwhelming. From membership practices including exorbitant price, unnecessary paperwork, and criminal fees, to belay tag enforcement, nothing distinguishes this gym from any corporate gym in the country.
The greatest thing that is lacking is a cohesive sense of community. Compared to Movement Denver, which I enjoy climbing at due to the friendliness, humility, and congeniality there is a general air of pretense and unfriendliness in Movement Boulder. Super-cool boulderers form cliques based on who is sending V8 or harder and who is a professional, sponsored climber. Some (I'm looking at you Carlo Traversi) don't even feel compelled to acknowledge the existence of other people if they are not at the elite, upper crust of social media-saturating, sponsored douchebaggery. Many sport climbers are too busy crushing and hanging out with their latest ultra-toned love interest or Rifle-binging training partner to share a friendly smile with a stranger.
There is more. I am completely apalled by the complete absence of female routesetters, which is a big deal if you consider that 50% of Movement Boulder's clients are women. The head route-setter employs nepotic and cronyist hiring practices and the management does nothing to temper these offenses. The gym's lead climbing ropes continue to be distributed well past the point of a complete loss of dynamic elongation, extensive flat-spotting, and absurd core-slippage. This sort of cost-cutting is unbelievable if you consider that the EFT membership, for which one must pay an initiation fee, is $75. The parking at Movement Boulder is hardly sufficient for even 50% of climbers who go there on weeknights. The facility is overall much too small and understaffed for the heavy traffic that it receives. The employees are trained to act more like police than like customer service representatives at times, and finally, the place smells foul. When I sweat in other places or outside, I don't smell of the putrid, mildewy aroma that permeates my body when I climb in this greasepool. The smell of working hard at Movement Boulder has a distinct pungency reminiscent of clothes that have been left in the washer for a week mixed with sweaty running socks. There is something in the air, and it is not just my imagination.
That is all. If I lived in Denver, I would continue climbing at Movement. However, although many of my good friends and acquaintances climb at Movement Boulder, I will not be seeing you again next year. I am just too tired of bleeding cash for this bullshit. Thanks for reading!